Got a gun? You get none!

Women. Have. Power.

Join the conversation…

TORONTO: Gun ban rejected. Bullet ban rejected. Code of silence. Culture of fear. What can we do? I’m just putting this out there. I’ve been thinking about it for years. Sistahs, we need to use our own power and have a BAN on SEXUAL RELATIONSHIPS with men that have guns. Period. Maybe if violent men did not have an opportunity to reproduce, they would just die out and leave the positive people to populate the Earth. Yaa Asantewa got the Asante women to shut it all down when the men would not fight against colonialism. WE could shut it all down to encourage men to stop warring in our communities, killing our children, destroying our families. (Think: If you have a GUN, you get NONE??) It could work. It’s just one thing. But it’s something. We could make history. True maybe he could still get it from some other senseless sistah. But it doesn’t have to be you. You deserve better. Think about it.

What do YOU think?

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12 thoughts on “Join the conversation…

  1. 98dayjourney on said:

    We do deserve better in so many ways. Women in 1st world countries focus so much on 1st world problems (what’s in my Starbucks coffee, how many pairs of shoes are too many) that we don’t lend the attention we should to troubles that have far reaching effects: how poorly our communities are ran, how unsafe our streets and how uneducated are our children. Time for a turnaround.

  2. Fantastic idea. Now to figure out how to spread the word and make these young girls understand that they really do hold all the power.

  3. Natasha V. Jones on said:

    You KNOW I approve this message. Challenge is that unfortunately so many times we as women get so wrapped up that we condone a whole mess’a foolishness. Let’s expand the movement: • You’re not his only “girlfriend”? – You gets NONE!
    • He has two women pregnant at the same time? – You gets NONE!
    • He doesn’t want to committ to you after a protracted relationship – You gets NONE!
    • He lays his hands on you? – You gets NONE!

    Women, you are too precious and valuable. to put yourselves, your families and your children
    (current & future) in the literal and figurative line of fire.

  4. i think this is a great idea…in theory.
    in reality – it’s much more than just a simple no-sex-for-you.

    this blog/idea reminds me of a fictional book called holding out.
    (from amazon)
    Like millions of American women, Lauren Fontaine, thirty-six-year-old Atlanta financial wizard and single mother, was outraged when the wife of a top government leader committed suicide after enduring years of spousal abuse. Worse, the abuser stayed in office, no blame, no shame. But it was Lauren’s brilliant idea to stage a protest that would hit men where they live: no sex. Nada, zip — until justice was done. A majority of women across America agreed. Then all hell broke loose.

    The male power structure — and Lauren’s new boyfriend — are miserable about women holding out. Now someone is using dirty tricks, underhanded tactics, and outright terror to stop Lauren and her movement. The eye-popping results make for the wisest, funniest, and most provocative book you’ll read this year. Holding Out is a call to arms you won’t soon forget.

    in the book, some women start to suffer serious repercussions for joining this movement. while we know legally, any woman can say no – many men (especially in marriages) don’t believe that to be the case.

    and since women still earn less than men – some women are in the position of financially relying on men for support (with or without children).

    if children are involved, it makes the whole thing that much more tenuous.

    again, i would love nothing more for women to unite – but we have also become our worse enemies. we see each other as competition for anything/everything – and scruples and values have gone out the door when it comes to having/keeping a man. what one woman refuses to do, there are a handful ready to take her place. and men know this.

    it’s also problematic to reduce women to ‘just sex’. to think that our only means of control is with our bodies, lends itself to a whole other argument.

    i dont know what the solution is. i know there is a problem and it needs to be fixed – but am just not sure if this is the way to do it.

    lets keep the conversation going before more parents have to bury their children.

    • The book sounds like a must-read and I am definitely going to check it out. Thanks for that. The idea of no-sex definitely starts a whole lot of questions rolling, and they are not simple. What do we as women value? Why do we choose to share our bodies and our lives with men who are dangerous or violent…even if the violence is not directed at us per se but towards others? Sex, or lack thereof may not be the solution for everyone but the conversation will be three catalyst for someone to make a change. Thanks for sharing your wisdom here, great perspectives.

  5. Listened to the conversation today Nicole and Dr. Roz, remarkable women, period:)

  6. Frank Ch. Eigler on said:

    If your boyfriend is an armed criminal, perhaps leaving him permanently would be wiser than “holding out” awhile.

  7. Strepsiades on said:

    You have tradition on your side that’s older than Yaa Asantewaa. Check out performances of Aristophanes’ play “Lysistrata” on youtube.

  8. Gah! where to begin? this is certainly an interesting idea, and it seems to have been effective before, but I can’t condone using sex as a reward or weapon. A woman’s body is not a tool to get what she wants (even if she wants no guns), nor is it a reward to her partner for good behaviour. A woman’s body is her body, and whom she shares it with is a personal expression of her sexuality. I would hope that if these women really hate gun violence that much that they would stop being with these men, and would teach their sons and daughters that violence doesn’t solve anything. We won’t affect real change by bribing gang members, we can only hope to convince them that their actions destroy their community, and teach future generations how to properly resolve conflict.

  9. jimmyzline on said:

    Women everywhere take heed: do not associate with thugs and criminals and you will not have to make these kinds of choices or ultimatums. If you are anti-gun, would you even consider a relationship with a gun owner?

  10. Fine, it is great to point out that other sisters can offer to a gun man that sex. At the end you loose your marriage and family or bring the violence to yourself. Another danger is that one day a sweetheart can be a victim when relationship go sour. Violence is a creation of the society, no one would ordinarily choose the way. Women should channel energy to compel government to mop up arms from the society through making of enabling laws.

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